Design is Hard

[An honest documention]

6.25

The online design world is such an illusion, especially for new designers. All you see are perfect sketches, realistic renders, constant creativity and finished products. It can all feel very overwhelming and the need to meet this standard can feel defeating. From what I’ve found that is not the reality of design. I don’t think it's said enough, design is hard.

My search for honesty in this crazy field began back in 2021. I had just gotten into the design program, Offsite, which is the best thing to happen to me, but at the. same time I was plagued by imposter syndrome. I was a third year design student in a class of graduates (or soon to be) and professionals. I felt so underqualified and alone in my fear. In this loneliness, I realized that I was falling into the same trap as everyone else. After portfolio review I only showed the checkbox that I passed, not the one that said I was below average or the myriad of other checkmarks in things I needed to improve on. I only posted the best sketches or renders and when I deemed one not up to my new standard it would quietly get deleted from my page. In this realization, I decided to try to write a little more honestly in my instagram captions and was pleasantly surprised by the reception. For the first time, I was told my imposter syndrome was relatable and that my “girly” moodboard should be embraced. But especially as a student there is such a fine line in showing the messy honesty and wanting a curated page to impress professionals who could one day hire you. At school I was being told I wasn’t good enough or dedicated enough to get a job in ID, I had a professor who I felt was bias, and was desperately searching for an internship during a pandemic. For the first time I was seeing the flaws in design education and Offsite was proving that there were solutions. I was so aware of problems within this field and wanted to share my frustrations, so much so I began writing a manifesto. Unfortunately, as a student it can be risky to share stuff like that publicly, so I didn’t. 

Since I couldn’t do it myself I began searching for honesty through others. In a world full of curation that was harder than it sounds. Around this time, Offsite began hosting what are called Offsite sessions. They invite professionals to come in and share about different topics. One of these sessions was called “Being Human First” hosted by Rebecca Goesling. I loved her talk so much and have listened to it many times since. I realized the reason I loved it so much was because it was honest. It was the first time I heard someone talk about their struggles in this field. In being taken seriously for her passion for color, in finding her place in the industry and even how ID worked her into a stress induced illness. It was more relatable than anything else I had seen and I still feel that way watching it back now. When I had my own stress induced illness last year, I remembered her story and it made me feel less alone. 

Three years in and the design field has yet to magically become easier, despite the perception staying the same. After being sick last year I went through a bit of a design crisis and questioned leaving the field altogether. That Fall I was at a design conference talking to one of my favorite Offsite instructors. She told me that the imposter syndrome never goes away and that design crises happen every three years. After she said that I spent a lot of time wondering if that is true. It's so opposite of everything you see online. The vision that everyone loves design all the time. The posts that made me feel like I wasn’t a “real” designer because I don’t love to sketch or read design books in my free time. During my Offsite sketching course our instructor, Kelly Custer, emphasized that sketches are meant to communicate. They don’t have to be the “hot” sketches you see on instagram as long as they are conveying your ideas. This shift in mindset really resonated with me and was my first peek behind the curtain that what we see online doesn’t define good design or being a good designer.

To me with honesty comes empathy, connection, creativity, humanity. It’s what makes us human and not just a cog in a machine. It’s what can make us good designers and the reason why I believe AI can’t take over our jobs. So to everyone reading: share the messy, share your truth, and acknowledge that design is hard.